I recently watched a TED talk about a study that was done on happiness. It basically said that happiness does not always boil down to money and fame (shocker) but it has more to do with relationships. I am not going to say much more about it. If you are interested in watching it, I suggest you do. You can watch it here.
The TED talk inspired me to think of some things I could do to help myself be more connected in my own relationships. So here are 5 things I wrote down, number 2 is by far the hardest for me to do, but I think it is going to help me with my own relationships.
1. Open Up
Is there something you’ve been holding in for a while? Is there something you don’t want anyone to know? Give it some thought. Maybe it’s something you don’t like about yourself or maybe it’s something you’ve done, or it could just be a dream you have that you are scared to share with someone. Think about who in your life is trustworthy with this part of yourself. Find a time to open up to them, it will make you feel closer, and when you feel closer to the people in your life your overall quality of life and happiness improve.
2. Let it Go
Is there something someone does around you that annoys you or drives you crazy that you easily get frustrated with? If you already know this thing ahead of time and you know you will be around this particular person, make up your mind that whenever they do it again, you will not get angry with them, but you will let it go. Decide ahead of time that you will not be bothered by it. Take it a step further and decide to let it go more than a few times. You might be surprised just how freeing and happy this can make you! Think of the close people in your life, your mother or father, best friend, or sister. It could be an aunt or uncle, but someone you are close to.
We all have something in our personalty or something we do that possibly frustrates someone close to us. If we want others to show us grace, we need to show them grace. Think about how you normally react to this person in that situation and promise yourself the next time it happens you will not be frustrated with them but you will completely excuse them. You might find it allows that person to be more connected to you, which will in turn make both of you very happy. Happiness equals feeling connected.
3. Give In
There might be a certain way you like things done, or something you enjoy doing but someone in your family or a close friend is the opposite. It could be something simple like taste in movies, arranging furniture, vacation planning, or budgeting. You may think your way is the best, but sometimes someone else can have a suggestion that might be just as good but different than yours. If there is a certain way somebody else does something and you don’t like it, decide to give in and let them make the decision or do it their way, and give in without complaining or worrying. Take it a step further and if their way fails, don’t say “I told you so”.
4. Pay Attention
You may be busy, you may have a to do list, and your phone may always be on, but once and a while, put the phone down and practice listening. Practice really listening, listening and asking questions. Get to know your people better. I don’t know about you, but I feel like sometimes always being connected to my phone, keeps me a tad bit distracted, to where I might not pick up on someones feelings. I mean, most of the time I am very good at telling if a person is happy, sad, worried, or tired, but the need to check my phone sometimes desensitizes me to those around me. Basically, putting my phone down once in a while and concentrating on those around me is a huge struggle, but worth it. True quality time that you give to those around you is priceless.
5. Write a Letter
This is simple. Think of a few good things about someone you know. Write them a letter letting them know how grateful you are to have them in your life and just list the things that you appreciate about them. You can’t go wrong with this one, it’s thoughtful, and it’s like a little gift but it doesn’t cost you anything, just time.
I pray you stay connected to those around you who truly matter in your life! I am praying peace and love over your life!